Candy corn, part two!

Warning: this is not the most "diabetic" post ever. If you are looking for words of "wisdom" about dealing with diabetes, I'll try to do better next blog.  This one is just kinda silly.  

So, as I mentioned, I love candy corn.  Really.  Like, a lot.  And, as I also mentioned, I bought some candy corn to make a craft, for fall, because...you got it...I love candy corn.  I know that some of you were doubters...you know firsthand the pull of siren call of the candy corn...even if you aren't diabetic, let's face it...there is NO nutritional value in candy corn.  So therefore, no one should really be eating it.  But, let's face it...it's yummers.  

So, just to have the excuse of buying it, I decided to do a craft that I saw last year, but got too lazy to do.  Why not do it this year?  Simple, right up my alley.  

Starts like this:

tray o'candy corn

bags o'styrofoam balls

Then, you apply an amazing amount of hot glue, and glue on each individual candy corn to the styrofoam balls.  Gets a little challenging when you don't have any free space to hold onto.  Broke a few corns, which is just a crying shame, because they have glue on them, so they are just wasted.  Oh, the horror!!

About 1/3 of the way through, I'm thinking, "Oh, these are just going to look stupid!  What a waste of perfectly good corn!".  

kinda lame looking...no potential seen

 

Then, about 1/2 way through, you start to see the potential.  Then, when you are done, they are just kinda cool.  They kinda look like dahlias.  

The point of this blog?  Maybe that I have to find other ways to enjoy candy corn.  

Like, get candy corn socks as a gift from a friend, and wear them to make you feel closer to the Corn..

 

Although, remember that I bought a bag, then was afraid that I might not have enough, so I bought two more?  Well, over time, and quite a few lows, I have gone through one whole bag.  All by my little self.  Oops!  Bad diabetic!!  And, I've used about one bag for this craft...so there's still one bag hanging in the pantry, waiting to be used.  Hmmm...what shall I do with it???

Happy fall everyone!!!

Candy corn, part one

I love candy corn.  Always have.  Must be because it is pretty much pure sugar.  Yummmm....I always used to look forward to fall, and usually my Mom would buy a bag and dole it out (otherwise I would eat it all, and make myself sick).

I'm  remembering when I was about 5 or 6.  My sister (who is 15 years older than me, and so was rarely living with us in my memory) was living at my parent's house.  On the headboard of her bed, there was a shelf, and on that shelf, among many other things, was a covered dish, which had in it....candy corn.  I have vivid memories of sneaking into her room, climbing on her bed, opening the dish, taking just a few pieces (so I wouldn't get caught...duh!) putting the lid back down, climbing oh-so-carefully off the bed and sneaking away to eat my treasure.  Apparently, she never knew I did this.  Actually, when I told her about it, she didn't even remember having a dish of candy corn there.  Huh.  I guess you remember what's important to you.  

Well, the other night Dexie woke me up at about 2:48am.  Telling me that I was low.  So, after mentally whining, I got up and headed for the kitchen.  (NO...I haven't managed to think to put a source of quick acting sugar next to my bed!) When I arrived in the kitchen, I had an epiphany!  There is candy corn in the pantry!!!  Oh, the JOY!!!  Yes, I had purchased some.  For a craft.  But then I thought that I might not have enough for my craft...so I bought two extra bags.  (*hang head in shame*)  seriously...more on that next blog...  

Anyway, back to the epiphany.  What better source of sugar is there, really?  They certainly taste better than glucose tablets.  So, I have a handful (or two).  Then I head back to bed, satisfied that Dexie will be happy with me and let me go back to sleep the next few hours in peace. 

I lay down, get all comfy.  And Dexie starts vibrating on the table again.  So, I grab her and check.  She says I am trending down (still) and am at 49.  Really not good.  So, I wait, and think to myself, "OK, it HAS to start climbing...I ate pure sugar."  So, I wait...silence.  Ahhh....I close my eyes, and get ready to go to sleep again. 

Then, I hear a noise...Yes, it is Dexie.  Vibrating.  On the table.  Again.  So, I take a peek...and sigh out loud.  NOW, she is alarming because my sugar levels are rising rapidly.  Two arrows up.  (Sorry I didn't take a photo...but it was after 3:00am by now).  So, I think, "well, isn't that the point?".  I clear her alarm, and lay back down.  Ready to sleep again.  And, you guessed it...she alarms AGAIN!  Same as the last one...by now, I'm totally rolling my eyes.  There should be an exception.  It shouldn't alarm in the 15 minutes after a low...cuz you are SUPPOSED to eat sugar/carbs to MAKE you sugar rise quickly.  *sigh*  At least I know it works.

The next morning, as I was mentally reviewing the evening, I decided that if I have to wake up during the night to have a snack, I'm totally excited that I got to use candy corn.  Although, I really did buy it for a craft.  Really.  I did.

If it was just logical....

So, this week was interesting, diabetes-wise. 

Sunday night: I check my blood sugar before bed, and I'm at 158, and had recently had a snack.  So, I think "Good!  I'll go to bed...no worries!".  And, I do.  And, I'm tired, so I fall asleep relatively quickly.  About an hour and a half later, I am rudely awakened to Dexie vibrating away on the nightstand.  I can't help it, but I got sarcastic, in my head.  (Those of you that know me, you are not surprised).  I thought, "seriously???".  I check it, it says I'm low. One arrow, straight down.  My husband asks if I'm ok.  I told him that Dexie was smoking crack, cuz there was NO way I was low.  (Slightly ashamed to admit it, but I did...I said it).  So I stomp out to the kitchen where I had left my meter, since there was NO way I was going to be low overnight.  (Do I have to mention that my attitude was not awesome?)  In the kitchen, I check my blood sugar....and I'm under 80, which is where we have the bottom alarm set on Dexie.  So, I roll my eyes, mentally apologize to Dexie and have a snack.  I go back to bed, and have to admit to my hubby that Dexie was not, in fact, smoking crack.  Humbling. 

Monday: Go to work, everything's fine.  Eat lunch, a reasonably healthy one, and take the appropriate amount of insulin.  All's well.  I see three patients after lunch most days.  During the last appointment of that day, I feel Dexie vibrate in my lab coat pocket.  I ignore it, cuz my hands are in someone's mouth, and besides, I feel fine.  Well, obviously, a few minutes later, Dexie starts beeping.  (She kinda likes to be the center of attention...when she feels like it...so really, she's like a cat).  I apologize to my patient, take off my dirty gloves and check Dexie to make her Shhhh.  She says I'm low.  Seriously???  I feel fine, so I explain what it is to my patient (don't want him thinking I'm checking my emails on my phone or something) put clean gloves on, and get ready to finish up.  My patient is very gracious, and says no problem, and asks if there's anything I need to do.  I say, not yet.  Then, I realize how dumb this is.  Why would I wait until I feel bad?  Isn't that the point of Dexie??  I call for an assistant, who is gracious enough to help me finish my patient while I drink some juice. So, we finish up with work, and I go to meet girlfriends for dinner.  Not even an hour after the juice box, Dexie is yelling at me again!  So, I end up using my series of  lows as an excuse to have a not super healthy dinner, I take NO insulin for it, and I'm still not high.  We went out for frozen yogurt after dinner, I took insulin, and I finally got back to normal.

Tuesday: Again, all is well until after lunch.  I eat relatively healthy, take appropriate insulin, and again crash during my last patient.  The timing was a little better this time, and I was able to finish my own patient before chugging a juice box.  (Note: "juice" in juice boxes is sickeningly sweet!)

The other days were pretty normal, although yesterday and today I've been running high.  But, this I expected due to the time of the month that it is, hormone-wise.  But, usually, this whole last week would run high.  But, as you read, it didn't.  At all. 

Why???  Why can't it just be logical???  Why is it I can eat a certain menu one day and my body reacts one way.  Then, the next day, I can eat the exact same thing at the exact same times, with no more or less exercise, and my body does NOT react the same way AT ALL.  For those of us who REALLY like to control things, this is a huge issue.  Diabetes is just not logical.  The general concept is logical.  Figure out your carb/insulin ratio (I won't even mention that this changes over time), and it's a simple math problem.  This many carbs+this much insulin= it'll all work out fine.  Except that it just doesn't always. Is this what they call "new math"? So many varying factors, apparently including the phases of the moon, come into play.

And so, at times like these, I just have to remember to let it go...and let God handle it.  He's the only one who can.  And, also remind myself that there is no such thing as being a perfect diabetic (or PWD...person with diabetes) so I might as well not expect to be one.  Just do the best I can each time I have a choice to make, and deal with it as it comes.  And pray.  A lot.  :)  And keep Dexie, a meter, and some juice nearby.  Cuz you just never know...

Wedding Day

Last weekend, my husband, son and I went to a beautiful wedding.  Gorgeous bride, handsome groom, and beautiful setting.  Outside, Labor Day weekend in the Northwest, and it was beautifully sunny.  Amazing.  It reminded me of my wedding.  Not literally, just generally.   Chatting with the bride about where they were staying that night, and their honeymoon, etc, made me think about my wedding night.  Now, don't get all nervous...I'm not going to share THOSE details.  ;)  Just the diabetic ones.

I had been diagnosed with diabetes in March of that year.  This is November of the same year.  I was not pumping with Minnie yet; that didn't happen until the following year.  So, it's multiple injections.  And, it's my wedding.  So, dang it, I am going to have punch and cake.  Diabetes...diashmetes.  I'm eating it.  So there.

So, I slip away from the reception and go into the bathroom with my little bag.  Fortunately, no one is in there, and I hike up my skirt and shoot up in the thigh (with insulin, of course).  I slip back into the reception and get my cake and punch.  I sit at a table with some friends.  Take a couple sips and bites.  Get called away to say goodbye to some friends who are leaving.  And, move on to more friends, more friends, and more friends.  Fortunately, we are blessed with amazing friends and family.  :)  Soon, it's time to go change and head to the hotel.  So, I start to head that way...I remember looking for my cake and punch, but someone had already cleaned them up.  They were gone.  :(

This is us in our wedding finery

So, I change into my jeans and UW sweatshirt, and my hubby changes into his jeans and WSU shirt.  Yes, this is the night before the Apple Cup.  (If you aren't from the NW, and don't know what this all means, comment, and I will explain)  Last couple photos, and we are off!

This is what love looks like...

   

And, this is what competitive love looks like right before the Apple Cup

Close friends drive us up to the hotel by the airport. I am a little chilly in the car, but, hey!  It's November.  We check in, check out the room, and I start washing off my makeup and trying to take the bajillion bobbypins out of my hair.  Well, during this, I'm telling my brand new husband that I just can't believe how COLD it is in the room.  He says it's not that cold.  I insist it is.  (Great start, huh?)  He asks me to check my blood sugar.  I insist in a *ahem* not particularly nice, let alone submissive, voice that my blood sugar is FINE, thank you. 

Well, by now, my hands are shaking so badly that I can barely grab a bobbypin, and put it on the counter.  (you'd think I would have a clue, huh?...I didn't)  Hubs again requests (very nicely, I might add) that I just check it, just to humor him.  (smart man I married, huh?)...So, I sigh...loudly, and not particularly gracefully, but I do it.  I don't remember the actual number...but let's just say that it was WAY below 100.  And, I would guess, (in the days prior to Dexie) dropping rapidly (double arrows, pointing straight down and yelling at me).  So, the wonderfully patient man I married then takes off on a quest to find juice.  Quickly.  I down a half bottle of apple juice, and a bit later start feeling better.  Shocking, I know.  Ended up drinking the whole bottle that evening.  Not romantic champagne...apple juice.  Minute Maid, I believe. Ah, diabetes...you are everywhere. 

Looking back, I know I took enough insulin to eat plenty of sugar/carbs, but then was interrupted and never ate that much.  Learned from that mistake.  Also found out that crashing from not eating feels very different than crashing from overdosing on insulin.  If my blood sugar is dropping due to exertion and just overdue for a snack, I gradually get a little shaky, and often get hot flashes (a lovely preview of things to come...) then finally end up really shaky and fuzzy feeling.  Like I have to concentrate hard to focus on anything...and I'm a *bit* cranky...sometimes.  And, usually recover pretty quickly.  Well, when I OD on insulin, I crash quickly, get really cold, amazingly shaky and really quite snarky.  :)  And, it takes a LOT of sugar to recover.

I also have since learned how bad that night could've turned out.  I don't think the reality of diabetes had really sunk in for either of us.  Amazing to think we can be in our thirties, second marriage for both, and still be naive about something.  :)  But, we were.  Honestly, probably one of the closer calls to an ambulance we have had.  There are a couple others...but those stories will wait for another day.  For now, I just give thanks to God for protecting me that day, and so many others.  I know that the times I have awakened in the night, and decide to get up and check my sugar...it is Him.  And, I am truly grateful. 

Almost five years later, and diabetes has changed.  I can usually feel my lows...but not always.  Hence, the addition of Dexie.  Annoying as she can be, she is literally a lifesaver.  And, such a blessing.  A reminder that blessings don't always come in the package you expect.  Thank You God. 

My husband continues to be a tremendous blessing to me, a constant source of encouragement, and the provider of the occasional swift kick in the patootie I need to pull myself out of my "poor pitiful me" days.  He has been known to get up during the night and get my monitor or juice or milk.  He has sat with me and handed me towels to mop the sweat off myself during a doozy of a "hot flash" while waiting for the juice to kick in.  He has asked me, in a carefully neutral voice, if I am low, when I am biting his head, or the boy's head, off for absolutely NO good reason.  And, he has hidden the pitchfork after hearing a story of a woman chasing her husband with one during a little hypoglycemic incident.  Like I said, I married a smart man.  :)

PS...the Huskies won that year.  ;)  Go Dawgs!  :)

Non-bikini body

Lots of stuff going on here...Received my new CGM (just calling her Dexie at the moment...DexCom being the name of the company that makes it)  I also got information on possibly getting a new pump, and I might end up switching companies.  Currently, I use a pump by Medtronic (Minimed), so her name is Minnie.  If I switch, it'll be to a company called Animas, so the new pump would be named Annie.  We shall see...

And, please note...I am NOT sponsored or endorsed by ANY of these companies.  Just stating facts of which I am using, or might use, but I am not saying that one is better than another.

This CGM is really cool.  My husband and I keep checking out the trend charts.  They show all your sugar levels for the last 1 hr, 3 hrs, 6 hrs, 12 hrs and 24 hrs.  Kinda too much information, yet kinda cool to watch. When it wakes me up during the night because I am either high or low, it's okay the first time...but the second time in one night that it wakes me up, I get kinda cranky.  OK...moderately cranky.  I have had it for 2 weeks now, and I think I'm adjusting to it alright.  Sometimes, the logistics of where to put it, both the sensor on my tummy, and where to carry the receiver, can be interesting.  The sensor has to be 3 inches from my pump insertion site, the sensor and the pump insertion site both have to be at least 1-2 inches from the belly button, and frankly, that just seems overwhelming sometimes.  :)  So, currently I have Minnie on the right side and Dexie on the left.  But, I need to switch them this next time.  It's probably a good thing that I don't have anything remotely resembling a bikini body, because my tummy looks interesting.  :)  As for the receiver, I think it needs a pager button on the sensor.  I have misplaced it a few times, and I run around the house in a panic trying to figure out where I set it down last.  If I could page it, and follow the beep, that would be fantastic.  Like when you have to call your cell phone from the land line, or someone else's phone to find out where it is.  (You know you've done it too!!)

On a totally different note...I saw on Facebook the other day that Medtronic contacted people in the areas that were expected to be hit by Hurricane Irene, and reminded them to take their pump supplies if they had to evacuate, and also gave them their emergency supply number, so they could contact them if necessary.  Great move, Medtronic!! 

I remember a few years ago, we had a pretty ugly ice storm here (probably no biggie for other parts of the country, but here in the NW, we don't do that extreme weather too often!)  Power went off, we didn't have a generator.  Had to keep the insulin cold.  And, had just filled my prescription, and had quite a bit of it.  I was afraid to keep it outside, since it was SO cold, and it's not supposed to freeze.  Probably could've put it in the garage, but we ended up getting to a friend's house, who had a generator  that allowed them to keep their refrigerator going.  One of those weird things I had never thought of before.  Never think Mother Nature is going to have much to do with your diabetes, and yet...of course it does.  EVERYTHING is affected by diabetes.   Even your bikini body.  :)

Getting closer...

OK, well, just a couple of days til I start on the CGM.  Quite a few of you helped me with ideas on names, mostly on Facebook.  Some very original, funny ones too!!  Thank you so much!  Still haven't decided on one, (well, okay, two...) but we shall see how it goes.  Might have to live with it for awhile...Update later.

So, for some reason, I am now getting nervous about this whole thing.  The logistics of it are stressing me out.  So, I have the pump attached to my tummy, which lives in my pocket or clipped onto my belt or waistband.  Possibly, in a thigh strap with a dress, or occasionally in my bra.  I already have to make that decision daily, sometimes multiple times a day, depending on what I am doing and how many times I have to change my clothes.

Then, when I go to bed, I have to clip it on my jammies, and try not to roll onto it while I'm sleeping.  Don't misunderstand me, I DO roll onto it, and it briefly wakes me up, til I move it or I move, and go back to sleep.  Seriously, I don't think I have slept through an entire night since I got it.

THEN, I am about to add another piece of machinery to my gadget collection.  It will be attached to me, but it's wireless.  However, it will still need to be near me...like in my purse, pocket, on my nightstand, etc.  So, not QUITE as much of a pain, but still a pain.  Not to mention that I have to carry my monitor, test strips, and poke-er thingee with me, plus glucose tablets, at all times.  I used to like little to medium sized purses.  Now, I require medium to large.  Mostly large.  (Partly because of my gorgeous, luxurious, big ol' wallet that my son gave me for my birthday...super cute, non-diabetic story)  Anyway, this whole electronic aspect of diabetes has changed life in ways both big and small.  Some involuntary, some voluntary.  This next step is voluntary.  Recommended and encouraged by my doctor.  But still my choice.  Sometimes I wonder why I am excited about it.   

I am quite a control freak about lots of things.  My doctor says that diabetes is a great disease to have if you are a control freak.  And, this new gadget will help me get it under really tight control.  Which is cool.  Really cool.  :)   So, I have been chatting with God about this, and realizing that He has a plan.  And, that it will be okay.  "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Phil 4:13)  I believe this is a step that God wants me to take.  I understand that it might not be easy.  But it will be good for me, and will help me to be healthy, and to take care of this imperfect body that God gave me, until I get to heaven for that awesome, perfect heavenly body. (I am just assuming that if it is "perfect" that it will include a functioning pancreas. Yay God!) Yes, I still have to make healthier choices in eating and choose to exercise more often (okay, at all!)  But still..."'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord. 'Plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to bring you hope and a future.'" (Jer. 29:11)  Oh, that gives me such peace when I just remember to remember it!!

Name those appendages!

So, last Friday (early!!!) I received my Dexcom Continuous Glucose Monitor (CGM) in the mail.  Very exciting for a geek like me.  Unfortunately, I couldn't get an appointment with my Diabetes Educator until next week to learn how to use the silly thing.  So, it sits.  In the box(es).  Not that I didn't open it.  I did.  And, I took out each part, and stared, intimidated, at the thing that you insert it with.  Very wicked looking.  And, I mean wicked in the old person way...you know, negative.  Not the young person, cool way.  Eek!!  Not that I am afraid of needles...but that's really not the point.  And, I looked at the super thick instruction manual.  And held the tutorial disc.  And the accompanying software discs.  Oh dear!  SO much information.  And technical stuff.  The geek side of me thinks it is SO COOL...and the other, less geeky side of me is intimidated and a little overwhelmed.

Now, if I haven't explained this to you, and you don't already know, the CGM is a machine-type thing that has a little attachment that goes on/in my tummy (a little bigger than the size of a quarter) that stays there for a week, then I move it.  It checks my sugar levels from the tissue fluid, which is just a little behind the blood sugar levels.  So, quite accurate, just a bit behind.  It checks every 5 minutes, then sends the info (wirelessly) to a receiver, which hangs out on or near me.  I can program it for certain high numbers and low numbers, and as my sugar levels approach those parameters, an alarm will go off and let me know, so I can correct it, however that needs to be done (insulin or glucose).  It'll also let me know whether my sugar levels are trending up or down, or steady or what.  For control freak-type people like me, this is potentially awesome!  Or, overwhelming.  We shall see which.  Most likely both...depending on the situation...or the day...hour....minute.

I was reading another diabetic blog and checking out a new diabetic website and I realized that another girl had named her CGM (Dexter).  Same brand as mine, so logical name.  Well, I was thinking about naming mine.  And, it'll have to be a name that goes with my pump, which isn't yet named either. I am thinking that they should go together somehow...you know, rhyme or something clever.  However, I am not feeling clever, and need help.  (I do have a ganglion cyst on my left hand that has been coming and going for years which I have named Fred.  So, that name is taken.)  Since they are (or will be...) attached to me, I am thinking that I want them to have girl names. 

Any ideas?  Unfortunately, I don't have anything fun to raffle off to the winner or anything like that, so you'll just have to do it for the fun of it, and for the great gratification of knowing that you helped me name my newest appendages.  :)

Let the names begin!!!